Where does Brumbylon Music Come From?
This week’s feature: Got to Get to You
“Maybe a better way over, would be to find a way around”
Some song meanings are very clear from the git-go, and some not so much. For me this would be the latter. This song feels considerably light under the dire circumstances presented: “I fell off the side of a mountain. There wasn’t much I could do”. Well, if one is actually falling, there is little that can be done, except maybe think about how you got there, and what you could or would do differently, if you happen to land safely. Or maybe just scream a lot.
The song was written in 2014 for reasons I’ll explain another time (relating to my New Zealand history). The video was made in 2018 because…well, mountain.
Lisa and I climbed the Grand Teton, the highest peak in the Teton Range of Wyoming, in August of 2018. I actually had a lingering thought in the back of my mind before climbing …could the song be a prophecy? Nahhh, couldn’t be. Let’s climb! I’ll just keep that little piece of superstition to myself.
In the song, Got to Get to You, the “You” is represented by Lisa, my awesome wife and partner of 21 years and counting! While creating the video for the song, my thinking of “get to you” was to reach a deeper connection with Lisa. Creating the video with that in mind, and writing this blog today, brings me to the following understanding:
I had always been very protective of my heart, and was reluctant at best to let someone all the way in (even married, which is particularly strange). Partly this was from fear of being hurt, but more likely fear of being seen. I mean really, how could anyone love the unlovable (me)? That may sound a bit extreme perhaps, but I had proof! You know, the longer you are with someone the harder it becomes to maintain a detour around the heart. People leak, things become visible, cracks show.
Still, in the song I consider there may be ‘another way around’ so I wouldn’t have to expose myself and risk rejection or abandonment – issues that have been paramount in my life, and hence the need for protection. It seemed “the mountain” was actually one of my own creation, and maybe falling off was the best thing I could do – maybe that’s why I seem so happy about it.
The song also talks about my propensity for distraction, consequently missing or choosing not to see something that could save me pain or frustration down the road… Right, everything’s fine, its all good…hey, look over here at the beautiful mountains.
In reality, the pain and frustration still came, as did the clarity of needing to get rid of some old beliefs, open my eyes and heart, and communicate. Its an ongoing process. Avoidance is only a delay tactic, often with compounded complications!
I guess I’ve always known that there is a way of being me that is more powerful, beautiful and authentic than I currently accept that I am capable of, or perhaps even worth. That is what I’ve got to get to. As in a lot of my songs, the conversation that I’m having is with that higher Self. My “you” is actually a better me!
This is my second (6th, actually, but who’s counting) take on the meaning/history of this song. As some of you know from my previous writings, I was born in New Zealand. I left when I was 7 and did not return again til 2014. That gave me 45 years to acclimate to living in the U.S. Overall I think I’ve done pretty well.
After much trial and error creating my first intended post about this song, I sent it off to Lisa to edit, as is our custom with these blogs. She inserted a statement that made me realize the actual inspiration for the song, and it’s quite simple…New Zealand!
The moment I read her addition (…relating to my New Zealand history), I remembered the thought I had about the first line in the song when I first wrote it. New Zealand was my mountainous home, and at seven years old all I could really do was go with the flow. My mother was relocating me and my brother to the states to be with her and our new dad. “I fell off the side of a mountain. There wasn’t much I could do.” I don’t recall being afraid or nervous, but it was a big move for a little boy, I think my passport photo is a little telling.
I wrote the song, Got to Get to You, after returning from New Zealand. It seems that my visit stirred things up in me quite a bit, and left me with a strong desire to go back – not so much to live there again, but to spend time reconnecting with my family, my ancestral heritage, and my country of origin.
The second take on this song does not invalidate my first post. I think what confused me about it was adding the video, which carried a different meaning (as noted in my original post below). Welcome to my mind!
Enjoy our little gift to you from Brumbylon – we hope it finds you well and feeds your soul. Stay tuned for next week’s feature when we invite you back INTO THE CAVE!